Here are more tips for talking about report cards with your child:
- Ask your child how she thinks she did. This opens up the dialogue for any problems she’s having in the class or reasons for a less than stellar performance. And it sets the tone for parents to listen.
- If the teacher is commenting on your child’s chattiness or inability to listen, don’t set yourself up for an argument. Instead of asking why he’s chatty or why she can’t sit still, ask, “Why do you think the teacher feels you have trouble listening?” Getting your child to explain from the teacher’s point of view enables him to think about how his actions are being interpreted.
- Offer specific praise and encouragement instead of broad statements. Try: “You worked very hard to bring up your math grade this period,” instead of “Great job in math.”
- Separate your child from his grades. No parent wants his child to feel his self-worth is derived from what teachers say about him. Consider statements like, “I love you, but I don’t like this report card” as a way to distinguish between the two.